META FANFIC: Fandom Grammar answered my question!

Because I'm perverse and like to write fanfic in 1st person, there are some situations when I try little narrative tricks that amuse me, but aren't standard enough for grammar and punctuation manuals to address.

I'd asked about how to interrupt dialog with INTERNAL DIALOG over at fandom_grammar and they finally answered! And used most of the dialog I provided, from Firefly, The X-Files, and Stargate SG-1. :-D

If you haven't discovered fandom_grammar, give it a shot! The community is friendly, nerdy, scholarly, and covers lots of fandoms.