campylobacter: Geek Sexy Daniel (geek-sexy)

TITLE: Ready When You Get Back [subtitle V is for VAH-fels]
SERIES: Part 2 of 3 for "Three Waitresses Daniel Never Met"
BETA-READER: oceania
CHARACTERS: Daniel Jackson, Nick Ballard, Oma Desala
RATING: G/K/FRC (all ages)
CATEGORY/GENRE: Angst; Time Travel Alphabet Soup; Episode Related

TIMELINE/SPOILERS: 2x04 "The Gamekeeper"; 3x21 "The Crystal Skull"; 8x18 "Threads"
ARCHIVE: send me a URL if you archive this so I can pimp your site
WORD COUNT: 1131

SUMMARY/SYNOPSIS/PREMISE: What if you could place a breakfast order 30 years into the future? "My grandfather brought me here after my parents' funeral. I had waffles."

NOTES: You really, really need to be familiar with "Threads", but I've listed the references/easter eggs at the end just in case you need a kick in the memory.

=====

The bell over the door makes a musical ring as he and his grandfather enter. Daniel hasn't eaten much of anything in two days, and is surprised when his mouth waters at the sweet scent of maple syrup. The aroma is the same as when his parents took him to a Rhode Island sugarhouse over a year ago, when the snow was beginning to melt.

 

 

The sign on the hostess podium says, "Please SEAT YOURSELF". A short, blonde, curly-haired waitress walks by with a plate of waffles and fruit. His grandfather spots an empty booth, and they each slide into a vinyl-covered bench the color of pea soup.

"H-how do you say 'waffles' in Nederlands, Grampa?"

"Nick."

Read more... )
campylobacter: battery operated fruitcake (fruitcake)
I manipped this as an illustration for my Daniel/Vala story "Once Upon a Ha'tak". Vala's head is from episode 10x08 "Memento Mori", and Daniel's is from 9x02 "Avalon Part 2".

campylobacter: Geek Sexy Daniel (geek-sexy)
TITLE: Muh Jell-O
SERIES: Part 1 of 3 for "Three Waitresses Daniel Never Met"
AUTHOR: [personal profile] campylobacter
RATING: General/All Audiences
WARNING: none apply
CATEGORY: episode tag; humor; Gen
PAIRINGS: none
WORD COUNT: 360
FANDOM: Stargate SG-1
CHARACTERS: Daniel Jackson, the waitress from "Holiday"
SPOILERS/TIMELINE: 2x17 "Holiday
SUMMARY/PREMISE: That awkward feeling when you walk into the wrong diner...

NOTES: Inspired by [personal profile] magnavox_23's wallpaper "Fred & Machello's Big Day Out!" for the Season Two Challenge at Event Horizons

Click here to read the story on LJ
Click here to read the story on AO3
Click here to read the story... )

Part 2: "Ready When You Get Back"

campylobacter: campy's porn shack (HATERZ)
Come on, y'all. You KNOW you wanna chip in to see animated versions of Ba'al (Cliff Simon), the Sixth Doctor (Colin Baker), and Commander Ivanova (Claudia Christian) confront Davros (Terry Malloy) in a reboot of ALL YOUR BASE ARE BELONG TO US, the great-grandmother of all Internet memes.

[Originally posted by [livejournal.com profile] obsessivemuch1 at *signal boost* ]






talcMedia describes ALL YOUR BASE as "A monumental stupendous animated comedy parody mock trailer state of the art flat-two-dimensional animated short film in full Technicolor® and, even, Original Soundtrack!", which neatly encapsulates their off-the-wall sense of humour. Then again, since the thing exists down to Colin and Lizzie overacting, perhaps that's not such a surprise.

Yes, it's bonkers nonsense, but D:I6 is very serious and won't get off the ground unless AYB does. It's a bit of geeky fun, using one of the oldest memes around. If you don't know, "All Your Base Are Belong To Us" comes from the European Sega Mega Drive version of Zero Wing. The original Japanese was poorly translated with hysterical results. People pasted quotes on screencaps, posted them on the internet, and a cult meme was born.

For more information on AYB, visit the website or the Kickstarter page.
campylobacter: Jack, I'm pregnant. (MPREG)
STARGATECATSETC
  • Fri, 16:05: Want to write fanfic, but a colleague has produced a business flyer so FAIL that it can't been given to the public until it's redesigned.
  • Sat, 11:38: RT @sassycrass: Now, feminism isn't perfect. Its continued overall resistance to intersectionality is choking its vitality as a movement ...
  • Sat, 11:38: RT @sassycrass: That said, we NEED feminism. We need non-marginalizing, trans-inclusive, queer-positive, class-conscious, race-aware fem ...
campylobacter: are you mocking my hat? (tinhat)
TITLE: Y U No Pants or, The Emperor's New Kōan
AUTHOR [personal profile] campylobacter
RATING: PG/Older Kids
CATEGORY: Gen; Humor; Missing scene, episode tag
CHARACTERS: Lord Yu, First Prime Oshu
SPOILERS/TIMELINE: 7x02 Homecoming

SUMMARY/PREMISE: First Prime Oshu begins to doubt his Lord's godhood. For the SG-1 Allies Alphabet Soup.

Click here to read the story on LiveJournal
Click here to read the story on FanFiction.net
Click here to read the story on Archive of Our Own
Click to read the story here on DreamWidth... )

y u no pants meme guy
image source
campylobacter: battery operated fruitcake (fruitcake)

TITLE: The Second First Not Date
AUTHOR campylobacter
RATING: PG-13/Teens
CATEGORY: Missing scene, episode tag
PAIRING: Daniel/Vala
CHARACTERS: Daniel Jackson, Vala Mal Doran, Cameron Mitchell, Tomin
WORD COUNT: 1661
SPOILERS/TIMELINE: 10x08 'Memento Mori; 8x18 'Threads'; The Ark of Truth 

 

SUMMARY/PREMISE: Daniel & Vala's Not Date from 'Memento Mori', written on Groundhog Day, time loop style. For the Daniel/Vala Month of Love 2013 at LiveJournal.

The waiter has finally left, and now it's just Daniel and Vala. She's exquisite sitting there across from him, her face aglow in the candlelight. He can't stop himself from wanting her to finally hear how he feels: "Listen—"

She leans forward just as he does, eager to tell him something. "Ah—"

Their words collide and they instantly stop, arresting a moment heavy with anticipation. He loves to hear her speak (even when she's badgering him to irritation) but he can't be sure whether what she has to say will derail his train of thought. She's rediscovered who she was before becoming a con artist and a Goa'uld host and a woman trapped in a marriage of convenience by forced pregnancy — perhaps a village lass who led a simple life?

"Oh," she breathes, seeming to realize the gravity of what he needs to say.

"Uh, lemme start," he offers, pointing to himself. If he doesn't say it now, he won't ever be able to say it.

Read more... )
campylobacter: campy's porn shack (HUGS)
Best wishes for a full recovery to Corin, who played Jonas Quinn on Stargate SG-1.  

He's in Belize to film his crazy SyFy movie "Poseidon Rex", and the Belize Coat Guard boat ferrying him to location collided with a sinking barge! His femur broke in 3 places & he lost MASSIVE amounts of blood, but he's now still in the hospital waiting for his blood count to go back up after multiple transfusions and major surgery.

The circumstances of the accident point to gross negligence of boating safety by the Belizean Coast Guard ferrying him & his crew to location; Corin asked at the outset of the trip why there were no lifejackets provided to him and his crew PLUS the boat was going too fast when it collided PLUS the pilot didn't see the half-submerged barge. We'll probably know a bit more as the story develops.

SOURCES: 
Man Injured In Coast Guard Accident Explains

Parker Lewis' Star Corin Nemec in Boat Accident -- Shattered Leg, Extreme Blood Loss

PARKER LEWIS STAR CHEATS DEATH
Actor Corin Nemec lost half his blood and nearly his life in a freak boating accident aboard a Coast Guard ferry.

GateWorld: Corin Nemec in Horrific Boating Accident

Fans Tweeting well-wishes; Apophis, Chevron Guy, and Ba'al, too!)

Jonas, Sam and Col Chekov

We're thinking of you, bro, and keeping the #madness fresh for your return.

.
campylobacter: Jack, I'm pregnant. (MPREG)
Dear sleeping plotbunnies:

NOW WOULD BE A GOOD TIME TO START WRITING.

Dr. Jackson writing

This has been a post inspired by [livejournal.com profile] magnavox_23
campylobacter: battery operated fruitcake (fruitcake)
Posted on Tumblr; I should repost this here, too...

Michael Shanks on Twitter, regarding the recording of dialog without Claud or Cliff present:

Twitter convo

campyspornshack: Great job on the @bigfinish audiobook "Half Life"! Very convincing ex post facto dialog w/Claudia & @cliffmsimon
MichaelShanks: thanks!!!
campyspornshack: Were you able to listen to @cliffmsimon & Claudia Black's pre-recorded lines while or before speaking yours? 
MichaelShanks: nope.......
campyspornshack: You performed the dialog with only a stand-in line reader? I'm even MORE impressed!
MichaelShanks: yep....

[Discussion of the Big Finish Stargate audiobooks here at [livejournal.com profile] daniel_vala]

campylobacter: my sweet (Qetesh)
Such sad news: Joel Goldsmith, 54, composer of Stargate TV music for SG-1, Stargate Atlantis & Stargate: Universe, has ascended to the Choir Invisible. This was first announced on the GateWorld Twitter feed.

Joel Goldsmith took the original David Arnold score from the 1994 Stargate movie and built an aural universe from it, full of hope, tragedy, loss, humor, joy and most importantly a sense of wonder -- the very core of what makes science fiction so appealing. The 3 of his CDs which I've imported into my iTunes library have been replayed SO MANY TIMES that the playcounts for EACH track, number between 136-303. His music is the background to my fanfic reading & writing. Goldsmith's music makes the moments I watch SG-1 & SGA so much more visceral. His recurring themes are characters unto themselves. I mourn his passing; his music lives forever in my heart & ears.

Stargate SG-1 "Ascension" Theme from "Meridian": A spare, simple harp ostinato with flute & strings accompanies Daniel Jackson on his journey from this plane to another.


Stargate Atlantis: "Atlantis Takes Flight": This inspiring march for brass, strings & woodwinds SOARS as the sleeping city emerges from the ocean; always gives me chills.



Stargate SG-1 Continuum "New Identities": This poignant musical portrait of isolation & patience describes how it feels to be wrenched from almost everything you love.


Stargate: Universe "Long Journey": Possibly the last piece Goldsmith composed for the Stargate franchise, it's a piano piece describing latent promise, with a cello underscoring the sadness of the farewell, plus a violin lending a bright echo of hope.

campylobacter: my sweet (Qetesh)
[Error: unknown template qotd]
RODNEY MCKAY: 135, but I'm shooting for 150 soon. 3.14159265358--
JOHN SHEPPARD: Um, Rodney? We don't care. (I've memorized 50, by the way.)
SAMANTHA CARTER: The Asgard data core once allowed me to enter up to 20 digits of pi to calculate a solar phase shift with random vect--
JACK O'NEILL: Carter, stop. The only pie worth talking about is one I'm about to eat.
DANIEL JACKSON: In Greek it's pronounced π, which is the first letter of περιφέρεια--
JACK: Daniel.
VALA MAL DORAN: General, you simply MUST taste the fruit pie Cameron's mother makes.
CAM MITCHELL: Aw yeah! I'm tellin' ya, hand-picked raspberries make all the difference. 
TEAL'C: How may we obtain this pie?

[livejournal.com profile] sg_fignewton's got some Samantha Carter genfic recs & graphics in honor of National Pi Day!

And HEY, y'all gotta vote for SG-1's astrophysicist in the [livejournal.com profile] sf_marchmadness Sweet Sixteen!

If voting once isn't enough, vote for Sam 4 more times in [livejournal.com profile] holdouttrout 's SUPER AWESOME POLL OF AWESOME. :D

More pictures behind the cut... )
campylobacter: ::iz ded:: (iz-ded)
I'm not voting in the 2012 FANDOM STEEL CAGE MATCH MARCH MADNESS SWEET 16, because I just don't care, but OMG...

the Sci-Fi/Fantasy March Madness is a heartbreakingly, coin-flippingly awesome bucketful of FEELS.

I mean, Samantha Carter vs. Jack O'Neill? WHY????????? Choose between them? So I asked myself "What would Jack do?" and voted.

Which leads me to recommend:

TITLE: Round Two
AUTHOR: [livejournal.com profile] openended
RATING: G/all
PAIRING: Sam/Jack
WORD COUNT: 437
Click here to read the story on AO3


campylobacter: battery operated fruitcake (fruitcake)
TITLE: New Life in New Dakara 1/1
AUTHOR: [livejournal.com profile] campylobacter
BETA-READERS: [livejournal.com profile] shakespherical, [livejournal.com profile] magnavox_23
RATING: PG/Kids
WARNING: so sugary, will cause instant tooth decay
CATEGORY: fluff, babyfic
WORD COUNT: 388
CHARACTERS: Vala Mal Doran, Daniel Jackson
SPOILERS/TIMELINE: post-Continuum
ALTERNATE ARCHIVE: at AO3
SUMMARY/PREMISE: That feeling you get when you wake up thinking someone you love is gone, but it was just a bad dream. Written for the [livejournal.com profile] daniel_vala 2012 Month of Love.
AUTHOR'S NOTE: I'm really wrecked over what happened to Dakara in 10x7 Counterstrike, so I wanna see it rebuilt. (There's also a mediocre illustrative photo manip from a much better screengrab snurched from the MS Screen Cap Site by [livejournal.com profile] dankriss. The inspiration for the vignette came from an article about co-sleeping & bed-sharing.)

Click here to read the story... )
campylobacter: ::iz ded:: (iz-ded)
TITLE: N Is for What Do You Call Him?
AUTHOR: [livejournal.com profile] campylobacter
BETA READER: [livejournal.com profile] shakespherical
RATING: PG-13/Teens
WARNING: language (mild swearing), violence (guns, injuries)
CATEGORY: Gen; action/adventure
WORD COUNT: 690
CHARACTERS: Cameron Mitchell, Colonel Reynolds, Samantha Carter, Daniel Jackson, Vala Mal Doran, Teal'c
SPOILERS/TIMELINE: after Ark of Truth, but before Sam gets her own badass battlecruiser
PROMPTS: for Cam Alphabet Soup on 30 January 2012 Gen Fic Day hosted by [livejournal.com profile] sg_fignewton
AUTHOR'S NOTE: Ohhh what does that N stand for? Why doesn't that title conform to convention? trollolol

PREMISE: No one on his team calls Cam 'sir', but that's their saving grace.
click here to read the story... )
campylobacter: campy's porn shack (awesome)
Cadet Jennifer HaileySTARGATE 4.19 "Prodigy"

FRI, 15:29: Why can't I stop being distracted by her oversized nostrils? #Stargate #Prodigy
FRI, 15:47: Angry fireflies + Dr. Bill Lee + Cadet Nostrils = USAF female recruitment agitprop #Stargate

FRI, 19:10: RT @jgem87: I wish Dr. Bettina Fairchild was my doctor...lol
Dr. Bettina Fairlchild

FRI, 11:50: Community importing is live at @dreamwidth
DreamWidth logo OMG At first they said it couldn't be done because of intellectual property issues, but OpenID seems to be the solution to giving people control over their content. WIN!!!!!
  • FRI, 14:21: RT @CarrieFFisher: My friend went to St. Barts and all she got was an unsaintly vaginal infection. I am going to have t-shirts made.
  • FRI, 15:07: RT @aboleyn: @TheBloggess I dare you to stand up and yell "I've had enough of these mother effing zombies on this mother effing plane."
WRESTLING IS HOMOEROTIC & VERIZON = DOUCHEBAG
  • FRI, 18:37: RT @HortonRemstead: Oh my GOD wrestling is SO FREAKING DUMB
  • FRI, 19:01: RT @HortonRemstead: I am not being flippant when I say this bit of the wrestling is GAY......look at it, it's so gay......
  • FRI, 12:26: RT @Change: BREAKING: CNN just read statement from Verizon CEO that they respect consumer feedback and are dropping the $2 fee.
campylobacter: campy's porn shack (GATEFAIL)
STARGATE
LJ FAIL
LOLz, No Daddy, Spam... )
campylobacter: battery operated fruitcake (fruitcake)
TITLE: Counting the Steps Back to Safe, Chapter 3 "They Tear You Away"
AUTHOR: [livejournal.com profile] campylobacter
BETA READER: [livejournal.com profile] shakespherical
RATING: PG-13/Teens
WARNING: no pr0nz :(
CATEGORY: angst, UST; missing scene
WORD COUNT: 688
CHARACTERS: Vala Mal Doran, Daniel Jackson, Cameron Mitchell, Samantha Carter, Teal'c
SPOILERS/TIMELINE: Memento Mori missing scene
PROMPTS: for [livejournal.com profile] natalia5345 via the [livejournal.com profile] dv_exchange 2011 Fruitcake Exchange "Perfume & Promises" by Idina Menzel & "I'm pretty open to anything (especially anything angst!)"
SUMMARY/PREMISE: "The growing unfamiliarity of what she'd taken for granted as familiar unsettles her."
AUTHOR'S NOTE: This story was Gen until my beta-reader smacked it around.

Read Chapter 3 "They Tear You Away" )

PREVIOUS
Read Chapter 1 "Capture & Bottle It"
Read Chapter 2 "Even When We're Unknowing"
campylobacter: battery operated fruitcake (fruitcake)
TITLE: Counting the Steps Back to Safe, Chapter 2/3 "Even When We're Unknowing"
AUTHOR: [livejournal.com profile] campylobacter
BETA READER: [livejournal.com profile] shakespherical
RATING: PG-13/Teens
WARNING: no pr0nz :(
CATEGORY: angst, UST; missing scene
WORD COUNT: 1306
CHARACTERS: Vala Mal Doran, Daniel Jackson, Cameron Mitchell, Samantha Carter, Teal'c
SPOILERS/TIMELINE: Memento Mori missing scene
PROMPTS: for [livejournal.com profile] natalia5345 via the [livejournal.com profile] dv_exchange 2011 Fruitcake Exchange "Perfume & Promises" by Idina Menzel & "I'm pretty open to anything (especially anything angst!)"
SUMMARY/PREMISE: "I may not remember everything right now, but I do remember how I felt about you."
AUTHOR'S NOTE: This story is a pinch-hit fill, so I didn't have time to include all 4 song prompts.

Read Chapter 2 "Even When We're Unknowing" )

Read Chapter 1 "Capture & Bottle It"
Read Chapter 3 "They Tear You Away"
campylobacter: battery operated fruitcake (fruitcake)
TITLE: Counting the Steps Back to Safe, Chapter 1 "Capture & Bottle It"
AUTHOR: [livejournal.com profile] campylobacter
BETA READER: [livejournal.com profile] shakespherical
RATING: PG-13/Teens
WARNING: no pr0nz :(
CATEGORY: angst, UST; missing scene
WORD COUNT: 645 (all 3 chapters total 2351 words)
CHARACTERS: Vala Mal Doran, Daniel Jackson, Cameron Mitchell, Samantha Carter, Teal'c, Carolyn Lam
SPOILERS/TIMELINE: Memento Mori missing scene
PROMPTS: for [livejournal.com profile] natalia5345 via the [livejournal.com profile] dv_exchange 2011 Fruitcake Exchange "Perfume & Promises" by Idina Menzel & "I'm pretty open to anything (especially anything angst!)"
SUMMARY/PREMISE: "There's a clear path to freedom in the span of a dozen footsteps, and no one's in sight to stop her."
AUTHOR'S NOTE: I lost a limb feeding your angst monster, Nat.


Read Chapter 1 "Capture & Bottle It" )
Read Chapter 2 "Even When We're Unknowing"
Read Chapter 3 "They Tear You Away"

Open Journal

Friend/de-Friend/Ban me = it's all good.

Fandom's more fun when you're an equal-opportunity pervert (multi-shipper). Set porn goggles to maximum!

Mostly Stargate SG-1 with an intermittent chance of SGA & The X-Files.

BEWARE: My LJ is NOT SAFE FOR WORK.

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