campylobacter: are you mocking my hat? (tinhat)
[personal profile] campylobacter
TITLE: Y U No Pants or, The Emperor's New Kōan
AUTHOR [personal profile] campylobacter
RATING: PG/Older Kids
CATEGORY: Gen; Humor; Missing scene, episode tag
CHARACTERS: Lord Yu, First Prime Oshu
SPOILERS/TIMELINE: 7x02 Homecoming

SUMMARY/PREMISE: First Prime Oshu begins to doubt his Lord's godhood. For the SG-1 Allies Alphabet Soup.

Click here to read the story on LiveJournal
Click here to read the story on FanFiction.net
Click here to read the story on Archive of Our Own
"Bring me pants."

"My Lord, you are wearing them."

Lord Yu doesn't bat an eyelash. "I desire the pants with the red and gold dragons."

Yu's First Prime rues that day he was forced to assume the duties of the late lo'taur Jarran; domestic chores added to military command in His Lordship's service have become exhausting. "Are the pants you are wearing with the red and gold dragons not the ones you desire, my Lord?"

"You are clever, Oshu," Yu says as he rises from the sarcophagus. "These are the pants I desire. I am the oldest of the system lords; my wants are simple. Those younglings assume that the voices and memories crowding their minds make them great, make them gods."

"My Lord?"

"I am not great because I am a god, but am a god because I am great. I listen to the only voice in my head: my own."

Oshu begins to wonder if Yu has lost the only other voice he could have heard in his mind: that of the host. Yu's reposes in the sarcophagus have become less effective in restoring mental acuity. "My Lord, you are wise in all things."

"Why then have you not brought me pants?"

Oshu stifles a sigh. Where was an ambush by Ba'al when you needed one?

[end]

y u no pants meme guy
image source

(no subject)

Date: 2013-02-19 10:58 pm (UTC)
sid: (stargate Lord Yu)
From: [personal profile] sid
Poor Oshu! LOL. Love the punchline!

(no subject)

Date: 2013-02-19 11:13 pm (UTC)
sid: (stargate Lord Yu)
From: [personal profile] sid
I'm taking advantage of the opportunity to upload several icons that I never use: Chekhov, Tanith, and now Yu. :-)

(no subject)

Date: 2013-02-19 11:20 pm (UTC)
sid: (Jack who me?)
From: [personal profile] sid
Just ask Jack. *g*

(no subject)

Date: 2013-02-21 12:09 am (UTC)
catsmeow: Close up view of Henry's nose (Default)
From: [personal profile] catsmeow
Hee! Great punch line!

(no subject)

Date: 2013-02-20 05:03 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] magnavox-23.livejournal.com
LOL @ the punchline!

(no subject)

Date: 2013-02-20 05:06 am (UTC)
ext_391411: There is a god sitting here with wet fingers. (HATERZ)
From: [identity profile] campylobacter.livejournal.com
Ba'al makes everything better. ;D

(no subject)

Date: 2013-02-20 05:07 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] magnavox-23.livejournal.com
Ba'als in Yu's pants - even better!

(no subject)

Date: 2013-02-20 05:10 am (UTC)
ext_391411: There is a god sitting here with wet fingers. (kino porn)
From: [identity profile] campylobacter.livejournal.com
The visual image your comment has inspired pleases me greatly.

(no subject)

Date: 2013-02-21 07:27 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] franthewndrhrse.livejournal.com
I laughed. \o/

(no subject)

Date: 2013-02-21 11:49 pm (UTC)

(no subject)

Date: 2013-02-22 03:41 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] gategremlyn.livejournal.com
Teehee! The poor guy needs a raise.
From: [identity profile] livejournal.livejournal.com
User [livejournal.com profile] eilidh17 referenced to your post from SG-1 Debrief - Stargate SG-1 Newsletter - Issue 236 - 24/2/2013 (http://sg1-debrief.livejournal.com/100347.html) saying: [...] by Y U No Pants [...]

(no subject)

Date: 2013-03-11 06:58 am (UTC)
ext_1941: (alphabet soup)
From: [identity profile] sg-fignewton.livejournal.com
::snickers::

I don't really think Yu was going quite that senile, but... heh, poor Oshu!

Thanks so much for contributing, and sorry for taking so VERY long to get down to the letter Y. ::thwaps RL::

(no subject)

Date: 2013-09-23 08:31 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] hugrey26.livejournal.com
Hello
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