If Hollywood Movie Execs Had Cast THE LORD OF THE RINGS

[campylobacter]

The next time I'm tempted to nitpick Peter Jackson, I look at this list:

Frodo - Leonardo DiCaprio
Gandalf - Dennis Hopper
Aragorn - Tom Cruise
Sam - Jack Black
Legolas - Ben Affleck
Gimli - Danny Devito
Boromir - Kevin Costner
Pippin - Justin Timberlake
Merry - Heath Ledger
Galadriel - Julia Roberts
Elrond - Robert DeNiro
Arwen - Jennifer Lopez
Eowyn - Cameron Diaz
Faramir - Nicholas Cage
Theoden - Tommy Lee Jones
Eomer - Brad Pitt
Saruman - Al Pacino
Grima Wormtongue - Joe Pesci
Denethor - Jack Nicholson
Celeborn - John Travolta
Haldir - Arnold Schwarzenegger
Bilbo - John Goodman
Gollum - Jim Carrey
Music by Yanni

What's your Cast from Hell?